True Ancestor: "Violently Stupid"

That's what the usually mild-mannered Garrison Keillor calls the Republican Party in his latest op-ed piece, which appeared in today's Chicago Tribune(subscription required).

He begins by taking the GOP to task for trying to make Nancy Pelosi an issue in House races this fall: Do we really, they're asking, want a House Minority Leader from San Francisco?

Get it?

Keillor notes that this is but one example of numerous acts of idiocy that are undermining the assumption the nation has made for the past 20 years: the Republicans are the party of competence.

Keillor, his pipe-and-slippers baritone ringing in my ears, gets unusually direct:

Yes, the Irish coffee at Fisherman's Wharf is overpriced, and the bus tour of Haight-Ashbury is disappointing (Where are the hippies?), but the Bay Area is the cradle of the computer and software industry, which continues to create jobs for our children. The iPod was not developed by Baptists in Waco, Texas. There may be a reason for this. Creative people thrive in a climate of openness and tolerance, since some great ideas start out sounding ridiculous. Creativity is a key to economic progress. Authoritarianism is stifling. I don't believe that Mr. Hewlett and Mr. Packard were gay, but what's important is: In San Francisco, it doesn't matter so much. When the cultural Sturmbannfuhrers try to marshal everyone into straight lines, it has consequences for the economic future of this country.

This can't be overemphasized, as far as I'm concerned. We're at a crossroads. We are faced with several choices, and they all hinge or touch on our ability to harness and promote diversity -- of thought, action, belief and culture -- as our signal strength. This diversity has helped make us a great nation, not just in idealistic but in economic terms.

It's not just our economic hegemony that's at stake, though: it's the very legitimacy of our enduring political experiment. To watch as non-issues like flag-burning and gay marriage are paraded across the stage of political debate, at a time like this, is to see the cracks in our system growing wider: we are not brave enough, or smart enough, to avoid seeking personal political gain at the expense of our nationally enshrined liberties.

Keillor notes that the Republicans were never known as nice guys, but, until recently, they understood the consequences of their actions.

You might not have always liked Republicans, but you could count on them to manage the bank. They might be lousy tippers, act snooty, talk through their noses, wear spats and splash mud on you as they race their Pierce-Arrows through the village, but you knew they could do the math. To see them produce a ninny and then follow him loyally into the swamp for five years is disconcerting, like seeing the Rolling Stones take up lite jazz. So here we are at an uneasy point in our history, mired in a costly war, a supine Congress granting absolute power to a president who seems to get smaller and dimmer, and the best the Republicans can offer is San Franciscophobia? This is beyond pitiful. This is violently stupid.

Meanwhile, the GOP makes off with an early and hotly contested House race. The columnists may be the prophets of our time -- but is anyone listening?

--T.A.