When Father's Day Actually Means Something

Oldest Daughter and Gabe. Photo: Youngest Daughter. Driver: One True Wife.

I put no store (if you'll pardon the pun) by Hallmark holidays. But yesterday was the kind of Father's Day that really did remind me what an honor it is to be a father and a stepfather.

We convened for an early cup of coffee with dear friend and faithful reader Starry and members of her husband's family, who were in from various far-flung locations to spend time with the husband's father. The One True Wife and I were eager to catch up with Starry but we were soon folded into this large and friendly group, featuring Milo, one of the cutest children I've ever seen. And to be named after the hero of The Phantom Tollbooth! What a cool role model.

A few lazy and generally unproductive hours followed. I was given wonderfully stylish shirts by Oldest Daughter, who knows I never buy myself anything stylish, and who wished me a "Happy Not-Father's Day." Then my aged and revered parents came to spend part of the afternoon and have an early dinner. Oldest Niece came by, as well -- a gorgeous and hysterically funny young woman who will be attending a new business school program this Fall at the University of Tel Aviv.

I'm very lucky to be born into a wonderful family, and wound by matrimony into another: the One True Wife's entire clan, which lives within a 20-square-mile radius and loves nothing better than spending time together. If I need refuge from this cozy clannishness, I have my own family of five siblings, and parents who are wonderfully physically and mentally sound at their age (they just celebrated their 67th wedding anniversary). Part of what makes being a father special is being able to still be a son. And to be a son in front of one's children. And having fatherhood both magnified by and diminished to proper perspective in the web of two large families.

At dinner, we regaled each other with myth and legend from those families; Gabe read from a hilarious family biography he had written as part of a school project. To be able to see ourselves through his eyes revealed a lot -- mostly, how observant and articulate he can be when he's not watching TV.

After a delicious dinner of fish tacos and fruit salad, I drove the parents to rendez-vous with my sister #3, while the rest of the family did the dishes (my customary chore, from which I received a blessed reprieve). Then the children and I adjourned to the local driving range -- even Middle Daughter, who finds swinging clubs at round objects to be a very strange activity. Much hilarity ensued.

Then we stopped at Dairy Queen, and ended the evening (along with the Wife) at the fabulous basement theater of my sister-in-law and her husband, where we sat in electric massage chairs, ate ice cream and watched Slumdog Millionaire.

The world is a vast and remarkable place. And so is the Family.

--T.A.

Comments

[Danny]

I can't believe how much Gabe has physically matured since I saw him last fall. He's a man! You all come from great stock, but you know what a Gottliebphile I am.

Happy (Belated) Father's Day!